merepek

yes, maybe aku merepek dengan posts2 aku kat bawah ni.
mungkin some of people would care, but i dont really.

setiap baris yang aku taip pon aku lakukan dengan penoh yakin. muka confident yang amat pasti ada, timbul plak kerut2 kat dahi menandakan bahawa aku sangat-sangat maksudkan apa yang aku sampaikan tu..

tp kadang-kadang kenapa still ada manusia yang tak puas ati? kenapa still ada yang nak complain? siapa diorang? aku siapa? bkn makcik diorang. aku bukan maid diorang. jauh sekali pencukur rumput halaman rumah diorang. tp kenape kacau aku?

aku tak paham, tangan ada dua, org cacat pun ada tangan satu; tak penah lagi aku jumpa org cacat ada tangan tiga atau empat. tp bila ada dua tangan, kenapa tak hargai? kenapa sibuk nak pertikai apa yang aku smpaikan kat sini?
hmmm, dunia ni mmg tak adil, kadang-kadang kita tak nampak apa yang berdiri kat depan mata kita, tapi kita sebuk kejar apa yang berlari di hujung dunia.

jadi orang tu, biar lah jadi orang. jangan jadi orang yang tak serupa orang. yang di benci orang. aku maybe tak dapat nak puaskan hati semua kawan-kawan aku, tapi aku tak pernah kesah smua tu. sebab kawan-kawan aku tak pernah cuba nak puas kan hati aku. bila aku pikir, aku biarkan. sbb, bukan kerana kubur nanti kita asing-asing berehat, tapi sebab, makan nanti; mulut masing-masing. org kata; hidup kat dunia sementara, memang sementara. so kenapa perlu amik berat perkara yang tak penting? kenapa perlu besarkan perkara remeh?
ah, tak perlu kesah. biarkan saje diorang ni jadi kulat. kerak atas nasi. mungkin perlu ada air yang banyak untuk melembutkan mereka. jgn kisah. jgn pedulik. satu hari biarkan mereka tahu, siapa kita; siapa mereka.

blogger

again, i'm not a good writer or blogger. i'm very amature in this kind of thing.
i have just started writing blog for less than a month. personally, i think that blog is something about what you've been thinking of; you're sharing with people who wants to read.

i'm reading yesterday paper today, and there's a section; Petra is a criminal. if you don't know him, let me tell you who is him. he is a normal blogger, just like me or maybe you. what makes him a criminal is, he wrote in something that maybe sensitive to somebody where i found that it's not. he talked a lot about Altantuya's murderer through his blog; "Lets send Altantuya Murderer To Hell" which is i think, it's not a sin. he doesn't really pointing at anybody; but maybe it just that some of VVIP's name is stated through his blog, he suddenly labelled as a criminal because of accusing.

why did Petra labelled as a criminal actually? is it because of the VVIP? to make an example, will you been sent to jail if you accuses me anything i didn't do? NO. because i am nobody. i couldnt do anything to you. i don't have the caliber. i don't have anything. i'm not one of the VVIP. that's the differences it'll make. sometimes i wondered, what are these things?

democration are politics. why are everything have things to do with the politics?
why do we have to bear with it? who are we? who are they? they won't be there if we're not here. oh, please wake up.

back writing.

hello readers, i am back writing.

it has been 7 days since my last posts; been busy with works; plus, not feeling very well. i think panadol actifast works my fever out.
i am currently in padang besar, perlis and i swear, the weather here is really burning. sometimes ive been thinking about people who came here, if i were them, i would rather choose to just stay at home on saturday and sunday; having a nice conversation with girlfriends, online or either sleep than go to this kind of place.

oh yes, i agree that in padang besar you can find lot of thing such as merchandises, clothes and so on; the cheapest price you'll get in here. talking about things their sell, to be one of the people who lived in kl state, its been a pleasure for me because i can compare the price; one which is sell in padang besar, and which is sell in kl. there'll be a lot of difference with the price, but still using the same quality and material; or even it is the same thing. but, to look in different aspects; why do you have to travel like 6-7 hours, just to get rm20 discounts where it'll takes you 400miles away, and you've to fill your petrol for rm200+ maybe? plus, you won't get a good place to park your car.

it's not i'm being positive about vacation places in malaysia, but i've been everywhere in the state, so i think this is one of the worst place to be at.

back on track

aku ade penyakit! bkn h1n1 tp penyakit susah tdo malam. shyt. i shudve work on this earlier, tapi entah la. i thought its not serious, but since aku perlu kerja pagi today, so i think i shud sleep early yesterday.
ah iye, mmg aku da cuba bercinta lebey awal dengan tilam dan bantal, but then diorang cam takbley nak terima dan cuma menganggap aku memainkan perasaan mereka. oh c'mon guys, i need to sleep! around 11pm, aku da mule menggomol setiap inci bantal aku tapi still, and still cam ade satu tiupan di telinga kiri mengatakan aku tidak perlu tidur lagi. dengan muke slamber badak, for almost 4 hours aku cam menonggeng ke kiri dan kanan; pose utk jadi cover URTV next month. and, i dont know how; tapi finally, borang permohonan untuk aku tidur akhirnya diluluskan malaikat mimpi and aku tertidur around 4am. goooooooooshh.

well, i need to wake up around 5am. tp since aku tdo pon kol 4am, aku rase takde la comel mane pon muke aku mase matikan alarm hp aku tu. dengan berhempas pulas, penoh yakin dan efisyen aku menuju ke toilet yang aku rase tempat yang paleng ngeri nak dilawati pade mase-mase pagi camni. suddenly bila smpai depan tab tu, aku tetibe teringat psl orang2 yang selalu tak dpt cukup air kat africa, zimbabwe and negara-negara dibawah cahaya matahari tu. so aku bercadangan utk just jimatkan air, bagi menghargai mereka yang serba daif. jadi, aku hanya menggosok gigi dan mencuci muka sahaje pagi tadi. betollaaaaaaa. aku ksian kat diorang aje. so tanak la rugi2 air lagi. kang balek keje for sure nak mandi lagi. pastu nak tdo. pas bangon nak mandi lagi. see, berape kali seorang manusia bernafsu binatang cam aku ni mandii. euw.

permulaan hari ini agak baek, aku agak perasan bahawa aku seorang lelaki cina yang sangat wangi, since mata aku pon cam agak kemalu maluan nak terbuka akibat barah kurang tdo aku alami lately, ber-aroma-kan deodorant rexona women silver colour, half dozen perfume spray. aku senyum pada every each of my officemate. and i know, they don't realized yang sebenarnya aku kurang bermandi tadi pagi. haha, who cares?

and i'm sitting here, telling you guys on how tak malu nye aku. pedulik apa? haha ;D
now i'm looking forward for a breakfast. ergh.

please notice that :

I DONT WANT TO BE ANYBODY's BESTFRIEND.

FCUK.

i wish that this would never happen.
i don't know why.
oh yes, i wish i would know.
fuck you so much.
yes, fuck you right back.
why are you here?
you don't belong here.
please go.
please.

mayy :(

current song : november rain
current mood : so-so
current weather : raining!

well, i don't really like this kinda feeling where i have to cope between reality and fantasy. living alone in this creepy house doesn't make me feel any better.
sometimes ive been thinking about years back, where i am nobody; totally nothing.

i don't have big family; i don't have the laughter where kids should have when they're young. but i am glad that i raised well.

and sometimes the feeling flattered away, i just couldnt think much. i have been through the goods and bads, knowing every kind of people. i just can't stop making horrible impression from their looks, the way their talks. i just felt that they're a super clown who're trying to find way enjoying the life.

furthermore, there's nothing elses more to be thinking of; eventhough there is, i wouldnt want to care. i want to stop. this is me, enuff said.